After class we had a great meal, and then Chris and I rushed to give a study. Actually he dropped me off and then had to go to Staples to have copies made of tonight’s lesson. After every meeting for the series, we give them a lesson to study afterwards. I really want to implement this into my ministry. Which means I need to write out the evangelistic series information. When Chris was done getting the order in he came back to the study, and we presented the Three Angels’ Messages of Revelation 14. This is one of the most important messages of our time, and is probably one of my favorites. Its exciting, but I felt bad because he wanted more and we wanted to him to know more, but he wants ready, and we both knew that. but it went well.
When we were done with the study we went back to Staples and picked up the lessons. It was kind of expensive, I had paid for it, but I’m going to get reimbursed tomorrow; or at least I really hope so. But then Chris dropped me off at the library.
To say this first though, the series of meetings are going well. We have an average 60-70 non Adventists. But tonights topic was very hard because it was on Babylon in Revelation. So its going to be hard.
But, when I arrived at the library I first had to find a place to sit. And then I was doing a few things online and the next thing you know it Jill pops up. And I was like, “oh, Jill is back from Asia.” So we started to talk, and I just got the most interesting information – Jill is officially dating someone.* And not just anyone, but one of my closest friends. Since I don’t believe they would really mind me talking about it on this, because they shouldn’t be scared of telling others that they are together; but it should be a joyous moment for them. But did anyone know that Jeremy and Jill are in a relationship? Am I the only one who didn’t know? Why didn’t anyone tell me?
To be honest, I am not mad. I don’t know what to fully think about it right now; but I do know some things are for sure: this is very odd. I mean I have mixed emotions between feeling odd and elated. Its odd because Jeremy is one of those friends that I would always confide in about Jill. And its just different. And it is now forever going to be different between all of us as friends. Jill and I will never talk the same; even though I am sure we would wish to be friends. But I know what it is like to like someone and then they be talking to their ex; it just doesn’t go well. So I have come to the conclusion that Jill, Jeremy, and I are not going to be the same again. It almost feels like I am loosing two friends at the same time, at least friends on those terms and at that level. It’s just going to be different from now on.
Yet, on the other hand I feel great about the whole thing; because now it seems like I am free. I remember Jill saying that she “was never going to get married, because” she could only love me. And though for a while I thought the same thing for a little while, I believed that I would never be able to fully move on. But things changed, and I remember one day saying that I am probably going to get married someday. Its odd too, because its now more likely that she’s going to get married before myself, even though she was much more emotional about the situation and very serious about not getting into a new relationship. Yet its great because all the people who made me feel guilty that she was never going to move on, but is forever going to be in love with me are now wrong! And not just that, but now it is almost as if God says, “Malcolm, it is now okay for you to move on.” Not that I have still had feelings for her, but now that I can engage in another relationship again. So it feels great at the same time.
On another hand, I am excited because so much is going to be happening in the next 24 hours.
*For those of you who don’t know, Jill and I dated for over a year and half and planned on getting married. But we were friends before we dated, and we remained good friends afterwards.
I think this is one of the few pictures that I have kept since...
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